Let's get David Brooks fired and get Doug Glanville to write weekly columns in the NYT Op-Ed:
no offense DB, but you've fallen off worse than Raja Bell over the last couple of seasons.
Like, seriously, what the fuck is this?
Today's Op-ed.
2008/12/12
2008/12/11
Oh Baby
"Hollywood" Cole Hamels has this to say about the New York Met's performance over the last couple of seasons:
They are "choke artists"
They are "choke artists"
A handjob's a man's job, your job's a blowjob
I think I try to title every post with that phrase and always back out at the last minute. Not today!
Before I start blabbing about things I know nothing about, I want to enlighten you with a link of great interest. Before that, though, I want to let you know that if you asked me which former Ivy-League educated, center-fielder for the Philadelphia Phillies would be writing an op-ed for the NYT, I would have said Lenny Dykstra, and I would have been completely wrong (I don't think he actually went to college, but deadspin.com will inform you handily about his post-baseball financial successes, even amid the crisis! [quick caveat; did anyone wad more tobacco in to their mouth over the course of 20 years than Lenny? I'm gonna say no]. Penn Quaker alum Doug Glanville would be the answer: why is he writing about Tyra Banks? Perhaps more important, why is it the featured op-ed on the NYT website? Life is a wonderful mystery sometimes: EXTRA EXTRA READ ALL ABOUT IT
We are all very lucky people; in light of the recent economic 'crisis' that the world marketplace seems to be facing, it's nice to take a step back and laugh at how scared rich people are. What's going to come of Obama's presidency? There has been a substantial number of press releases from the "transition team" hinting at a serious initiative to restore the crumbling infrastructure of our fine country. Then Detroit got bailed out, and Tom Friedman put it best:As I think about our bailing out Detroit, I can’t help but reflect on what, in my view, is the most important rule of business in today’s integrated and digitized global market, where knowledge and innovation tools are so widely distributed. It’s this: Whatever can be done, will be done. The only question is will it be done by you or to you. Just don’t think it won’t be done. If you have an idea in Detroit or Tennessee, promise me that you’ll pursue it, because someone in Denmark or Tel Aviv will do so a second later.. My chief worry from the Obama white house, like Kennedy before him, is the pragmatic political shift towards the center; being centrist, while good in the short run, does not lead to innovative policy measures, which is exactly what we need.
Another recent NYT op-ed made open fun of the rise in popularity of briliant historian, Doris Kearns Goodwin's Team of Rivals =, which I believe is an important book, for giving us, perhaps, a false sense of hope for the strategy being employed, and for what it all means. Don't get me wrong, I think the president-elect has done an impeccable job with the transition to a new era, after 20 years of two families running shit it's amazing how he's breathed life back in to the executive branch with such alacrity and charm. Yet right there, charm, I again am worried that we are getting too enamored with an ideal president, instead of the real thing. This is why anyone who reads Team of Rivals should have to also read David Halberstam's The Best and The Brightest, which, through exhausting details (in the 20th anniversary introduction, Halberstam will proudly tell you in his own words) relays an amazing story of how so many brilliant minds could have corroborated on such a cluster fuck as our involvement in Vietnam. The Sam Rayburn quip alone makes the book worth buying, but maybe you might also get excited about a newer addition in which John Mccain writes a fantastic foreword.
That's about all the pseudo-intellectual garbage I can stomach, so everyone have a great weekend!
Also:
-Holy Shit! J-Rich, Jared Dudley and a future second round pick to the Suns!
-Antithetical reaction to the above: Javaris Crittendon to the Wizards! (dude had mad hype back in his ATL days, maybe you should all be patient with him since Arenas will probably not be back any time soon)
-And while we're on that topic, is there a more frustrating star in the internet age than Gil? Dude's clearly one of the most, if not the, fan friendly guys ever; even when he's blatantly stealing comedian's material (I guess shame on us for not calling him out on it immediately, or letting the guy who came up with the material in the first place speak his mind) or coming back too soon from his injuries to further stymie what was shaping up to be one of the most invigorating, idiosyncratic styles of play we have ever seen.
-Other players who were unique flowers, but never got rings:
"Pistol" Pete Maravich
Tom Chambers
Tom "Gugs" Gugliotta
Arvydas Sabonis
Jorge Garbajosa
-Now that Obama is president-elect, can we make cross-racial player comparisons?
-Bill Simmons interviews David Stern on his most recent podcast, number 100 (wow, he has a face for radio), and it's pretty interesting if you are obsessed with the NBA or with the voice of an old Jewish lawyer/typical suburban Bostonian.
Before I start blabbing about things I know nothing about, I want to enlighten you with a link of great interest. Before that, though, I want to let you know that if you asked me which former Ivy-League educated, center-fielder for the Philadelphia Phillies would be writing an op-ed for the NYT, I would have said Lenny Dykstra, and I would have been completely wrong (I don't think he actually went to college, but deadspin.com will inform you handily about his post-baseball financial successes, even amid the crisis! [quick caveat; did anyone wad more tobacco in to their mouth over the course of 20 years than Lenny? I'm gonna say no]. Penn Quaker alum Doug Glanville would be the answer: why is he writing about Tyra Banks? Perhaps more important, why is it the featured op-ed on the NYT website? Life is a wonderful mystery sometimes: EXTRA EXTRA READ ALL ABOUT IT
We are all very lucky people; in light of the recent economic 'crisis' that the world marketplace seems to be facing, it's nice to take a step back and laugh at how scared rich people are. What's going to come of Obama's presidency? There has been a substantial number of press releases from the "transition team" hinting at a serious initiative to restore the crumbling infrastructure of our fine country. Then Detroit got bailed out, and Tom Friedman put it best:As I think about our bailing out Detroit, I can’t help but reflect on what, in my view, is the most important rule of business in today’s integrated and digitized global market, where knowledge and innovation tools are so widely distributed. It’s this: Whatever can be done, will be done. The only question is will it be done by you or to you. Just don’t think it won’t be done. If you have an idea in Detroit or Tennessee, promise me that you’ll pursue it, because someone in Denmark or Tel Aviv will do so a second later.. My chief worry from the Obama white house, like Kennedy before him, is the pragmatic political shift towards the center; being centrist, while good in the short run, does not lead to innovative policy measures, which is exactly what we need.
Another recent NYT op-ed made open fun of the rise in popularity of briliant historian, Doris Kearns Goodwin's Team of Rivals =, which I believe is an important book, for giving us, perhaps, a false sense of hope for the strategy being employed, and for what it all means. Don't get me wrong, I think the president-elect has done an impeccable job with the transition to a new era, after 20 years of two families running shit it's amazing how he's breathed life back in to the executive branch with such alacrity and charm. Yet right there, charm, I again am worried that we are getting too enamored with an ideal president, instead of the real thing. This is why anyone who reads Team of Rivals should have to also read David Halberstam's The Best and The Brightest, which, through exhausting details (in the 20th anniversary introduction, Halberstam will proudly tell you in his own words) relays an amazing story of how so many brilliant minds could have corroborated on such a cluster fuck as our involvement in Vietnam. The Sam Rayburn quip alone makes the book worth buying, but maybe you might also get excited about a newer addition in which John Mccain writes a fantastic foreword.
That's about all the pseudo-intellectual garbage I can stomach, so everyone have a great weekend!
Also:
-Holy Shit! J-Rich, Jared Dudley and a future second round pick to the Suns!
-Antithetical reaction to the above: Javaris Crittendon to the Wizards! (dude had mad hype back in his ATL days, maybe you should all be patient with him since Arenas will probably not be back any time soon)
-And while we're on that topic, is there a more frustrating star in the internet age than Gil? Dude's clearly one of the most, if not the, fan friendly guys ever; even when he's blatantly stealing comedian's material (I guess shame on us for not calling him out on it immediately, or letting the guy who came up with the material in the first place speak his mind) or coming back too soon from his injuries to further stymie what was shaping up to be one of the most invigorating, idiosyncratic styles of play we have ever seen.
-Other players who were unique flowers, but never got rings:
"Pistol" Pete Maravich
Tom Chambers
Tom "Gugs" Gugliotta
Arvydas Sabonis
Jorge Garbajosa
-Now that Obama is president-elect, can we make cross-racial player comparisons?
-Bill Simmons interviews David Stern on his most recent podcast, number 100 (wow, he has a face for radio), and it's pretty interesting if you are obsessed with the NBA or with the voice of an old Jewish lawyer/typical suburban Bostonian.
2008/12/10
Sometimes
Sometimes you stumble upon something so great that you can't help but want to share it with everyone you know.
Moloko's biography on allmusic.com
Does anyone who reads my blog read freedarko? That shit is baffling me as of late, not that it ever made any sense anyway, but the illusion used to be so titillating and now they just reek of a crew that is resting on their laurels after writing a rather impressive book (which you should buy, because your trust fund can take the 15 dollar hit and because we'll be talking about in 20 years). They can't keep name dropping Halberstam and expect me to blindly follow their slacker tendencies; all I'm saying is there is no fire at all in their rhetoric, their generic take on the Mchale-Wittman carousel was reminiscent of the time George W. Bush choked on a pretzel; so many opportunities for liberal wit to shine, but instead we get nonplussed nonsense.
While we're talking basketball here's some things to consider:
-I was serious in the earlier post about voting in the all-star game; even if Yi and his cohorts get their way, we can at least say we tried, even if Jemele Hill is ALWAYS RIGHT; although can you really trust anyone who compares a figure in sports to Adolf Hitler (unless it's Adolph Rupp, then it might be somewhat warranted)?
-The Nets play the Knicks tonight; while it's certainly not on par with a Bobcats-Timberwolves matchup, I, for one, am excited to see D'antoni get dookied on by Lawrence Frank, by far the nerdiest looking head coach in professional sports.
-Dwight Howard is part of a continuum of "Big men who are able to dominate through a devastating combination of athleticisim and bulk". Amare Stoudemire reminds me of Dominique Wilkins; every day that jumper is going to improve. Also he's got a 32" waistline, that's a great way to preserve one's sexy.
-Life After Death is directly inspired by All Eyez on Me, discuss.
-Paul Millsap is a hero of mine.
-Blake Griffin, Oklahoma University's hulking, mullato (is this un-pc?) power forward, is a consensus top 3 pick in next year's draft. The comparison that continually arises is a freakishly athletic Carlos Boozer. Does anyone remember watching Boozer at Duke, and thinking the guy was a fucking mongoloid? Am I crazy? God, I hated those teams; even if everyone felt a little bad when Jay Williams got in that motorcycle crash, I was actually pulling for him to make the Nets roster this year, but alas Keyon Dooling's calling card is taking up empty space.
-Mabyner Hilario will never be called "Nene" on this blog, NEVER.
-Spencer Hawes can dunk, apparently. This is news to me. Just kidding, I think this kid is actually deserving of his top-ten pick status. Call me crazy, but he will have a much better career than the Nephew of the guy who founded the Beach Boys.
-Jerry Sloan is a lot like the Canadian power pop group that bears the same name; the look on your face is telling me you don't believe me. Might as well get to learning about this band that you ought to know about anyway: One of Canada's finest.
Moloko's biography on allmusic.com
Does anyone who reads my blog read freedarko? That shit is baffling me as of late, not that it ever made any sense anyway, but the illusion used to be so titillating and now they just reek of a crew that is resting on their laurels after writing a rather impressive book (which you should buy, because your trust fund can take the 15 dollar hit and because we'll be talking about in 20 years). They can't keep name dropping Halberstam and expect me to blindly follow their slacker tendencies; all I'm saying is there is no fire at all in their rhetoric, their generic take on the Mchale-Wittman carousel was reminiscent of the time George W. Bush choked on a pretzel; so many opportunities for liberal wit to shine, but instead we get nonplussed nonsense.
While we're talking basketball here's some things to consider:
-I was serious in the earlier post about voting in the all-star game; even if Yi and his cohorts get their way, we can at least say we tried, even if Jemele Hill is ALWAYS RIGHT; although can you really trust anyone who compares a figure in sports to Adolf Hitler (unless it's Adolph Rupp, then it might be somewhat warranted)?
-The Nets play the Knicks tonight; while it's certainly not on par with a Bobcats-Timberwolves matchup, I, for one, am excited to see D'antoni get dookied on by Lawrence Frank, by far the nerdiest looking head coach in professional sports.
-Dwight Howard is part of a continuum of "Big men who are able to dominate through a devastating combination of athleticisim and bulk". Amare Stoudemire reminds me of Dominique Wilkins; every day that jumper is going to improve. Also he's got a 32" waistline, that's a great way to preserve one's sexy.
-Life After Death is directly inspired by All Eyez on Me, discuss.
-Paul Millsap is a hero of mine.
-Blake Griffin, Oklahoma University's hulking, mullato (is this un-pc?) power forward, is a consensus top 3 pick in next year's draft. The comparison that continually arises is a freakishly athletic Carlos Boozer. Does anyone remember watching Boozer at Duke, and thinking the guy was a fucking mongoloid? Am I crazy? God, I hated those teams; even if everyone felt a little bad when Jay Williams got in that motorcycle crash, I was actually pulling for him to make the Nets roster this year, but alas Keyon Dooling's calling card is taking up empty space.
-Mabyner Hilario will never be called "Nene" on this blog, NEVER.
-Spencer Hawes can dunk, apparently. This is news to me. Just kidding, I think this kid is actually deserving of his top-ten pick status. Call me crazy, but he will have a much better career than the Nephew of the guy who founded the Beach Boys.
-Jerry Sloan is a lot like the Canadian power pop group that bears the same name; the look on your face is telling me you don't believe me. Might as well get to learning about this band that you ought to know about anyway: One of Canada's finest.
Brilliance
"When I turned the ball over, I'm so used to coming out of the game," guard Rashad McCants said. "Then I looked over and saw him clapping and saying, 'Come on, get the next one.' It gives you confidence."
2008/12/09
You Need To Take a Look at The Other Side
Hello!
You're back for more I see.
Some important developments here in Huelva;
-I have become the master of smothering loaves of bread in olive oil, thyme, chopped fresh basil, a pinch of salt, pepper, and (1 out of every 5 times) some chopped garlic in our shitty easy-bake oven and eating it when I get back from work.
-Todo el mundo está fucking loco por cerdo frito! (Rough translation: Everyone is going fucking crazy for fried pork in these parts!)
-No pacific islander group is more marginalized in the eyes of the Spaniards then our fine friends the Filipinos. What's that? You don't know anything about the Philippines? For shame, for shame my friend.
Brush up on the facts, motherfucker.
-Taka you can make fun of me all you want; Kate Mooney, and her theoretical co-conspirators had a brilliant fucking idea. Read about it here.
AYAYAYAYAYAY: Yi Jianlin might get voted in by China as a starter for the Eastern Conference in the All-Star game. I am no jingo, hell I barely got my absentee vote in the mail on time, but I'll be damned if I will remain mum about the ludicrous nature of the all-star game in the globalized age of the NBA. Let's stop this from happening, one vote at a time (maybe you should all tell your grandparents about this, it could be like Obama 2.0 (2.5 if you count the Al Franken debacle, yes I said it let's find new and exciting reasons to be American)
GET OUT AND VOTE PEOPLE!!!
You're back for more I see.
Some important developments here in Huelva;
-I have become the master of smothering loaves of bread in olive oil, thyme, chopped fresh basil, a pinch of salt, pepper, and (1 out of every 5 times) some chopped garlic in our shitty easy-bake oven and eating it when I get back from work.
-Todo el mundo está fucking loco por cerdo frito! (Rough translation: Everyone is going fucking crazy for fried pork in these parts!)
-No pacific islander group is more marginalized in the eyes of the Spaniards then our fine friends the Filipinos. What's that? You don't know anything about the Philippines? For shame, for shame my friend.
Brush up on the facts, motherfucker.
-Taka you can make fun of me all you want; Kate Mooney, and her theoretical co-conspirators had a brilliant fucking idea. Read about it here.
AYAYAYAYAYAY: Yi Jianlin might get voted in by China as a starter for the Eastern Conference in the All-Star game. I am no jingo, hell I barely got my absentee vote in the mail on time, but I'll be damned if I will remain mum about the ludicrous nature of the all-star game in the globalized age of the NBA. Let's stop this from happening, one vote at a time (maybe you should all tell your grandparents about this, it could be like Obama 2.0 (2.5 if you count the Al Franken debacle, yes I said it let's find new and exciting reasons to be American)
GET OUT AND VOTE PEOPLE!!!
NEWHOUSE!!!!
So if you aren't a regular at Newhouse's Bushwick blog then you are a fucking fool.
More important is his utilization of the film Roger Dodger to illustrate his point about struggles with relationships. That movie really hit home hard for me; a verbose male protagonist, prone to selfish delusions, takes his nerdy nephew under his wing for a night of debauch in NYC. The results are much darker and less slapstick than the average viewer may hope; but to quote Newhouse, "my humor is darker than [that of] the starting center for the Celtics." (that would be Kendrick Perkins)
2008/12/08
Brad Dickerson
this link is inspired only by something much more difficult to swallow, click through the next link to see vat I mean.
Everyone should check out Brad's Blog at trentontakes.blogspot.com
Everyone should check out Brad's Blog at trentontakes.blogspot.com
So I Married an Axe Murderer
Can I just say that there was a time when Mike Myers was on top of the world?
A couple quick thoughts:
-Lyndon B. Johnson was a great man (non-seq)
-Let's blow up the Chinese Basketball Association
-Chinese Democracy is real, hahahahahahahahaha, me so hungy.
A couple quick thoughts:
-Lyndon B. Johnson was a great man (non-seq)
-Let's blow up the Chinese Basketball Association
-Chinese Democracy is real, hahahahahahahahaha, me so hungy.
Update
Getting away from the dirty provincial capital over the long weekend was a real pleasure; Córdoba is kind of a piece of shit town itself, nobody picks up after their dogs, but what are you gonna do?
Banagher is an "Irish Pub" located a short walk outside of the center, where Theo, Pablo and myself enjoyed several delicious drinks consisting of blackberry liquer, red wine and coca-cola; I'm pretty sure there is a white, powdered equivalent of this drink that I nay cannot afford on a teacher's assistant salary.
There is a delicious dish known as a "plao" that consists of basmati rice, salad, falafel and sauce; best 3.50 euro I spent all weekend.
WHY HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN PHIL HARTMAN WORLD?!?!!? WHY?!?!?!
Banagher is an "Irish Pub" located a short walk outside of the center, where Theo, Pablo and myself enjoyed several delicious drinks consisting of blackberry liquer, red wine and coca-cola; I'm pretty sure there is a white, powdered equivalent of this drink that I nay cannot afford on a teacher's assistant salary.
There is a delicious dish known as a "plao" that consists of basmati rice, salad, falafel and sauce; best 3.50 euro I spent all weekend.
WHY HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN PHIL HARTMAN WORLD?!?!!? WHY?!?!?!
2008/12/06
Synagogue, New York
I think Jews are just about the funniest minority that ever was; except for every other minority group ever.
2008/12/04
2008/12/03
Fukhit
I put together a bunch of tracks in honor of Día de la constitución which falls on December 6th. That's right motherfuckers 30 years of spanish democracy; which means we can see more movies like this getting full blown releases:
Some Rhythm
Ok, I lied earlier. I didn't put together tracks in honor of the holiday. But perhaps you assholes who may read this from time to time would like to hear my quasi-demo tape. Why quasi you ask? One reason and one reason alone: there's no use in taking anything too seriously if you don't have to. With that in mind, it is my new found plan to adopt the word's of Allen Alda in Little Miss Sunshine. Anyhoo, here it is, my first real try at making music that doesn't elicit terrifying visions of Pablo Neruda shaking his taco booty.
Secret's out, J.A. Adande is the best basketball writer on the planet.Noone else has had the ingenuity to describe the Starbury saga as tragicomedy. Keep up the good work my man.
Some Rhythm
Ok, I lied earlier. I didn't put together tracks in honor of the holiday. But perhaps you assholes who may read this from time to time would like to hear my quasi-demo tape. Why quasi you ask? One reason and one reason alone: there's no use in taking anything too seriously if you don't have to. With that in mind, it is my new found plan to adopt the word's of Allen Alda in Little Miss Sunshine. Anyhoo, here it is, my first real try at making music that doesn't elicit terrifying visions of Pablo Neruda shaking his taco booty.
Secret's out, J.A. Adande is the best basketball writer on the planet.Noone else has had the ingenuity to describe the Starbury saga as tragicomedy. Keep up the good work my man.
2008/12/01
It's Hard to be a Saint in the City
I am terrible at this job, but perhaps you will all get a look at what an Oberlin education can do for a mediocre alum.
If the labrynth that is acquiring internet access can ever be exited, I promise to give away all my worldly possessions via the blog.
Love,
Al
If the labrynth that is acquiring internet access can ever be exited, I promise to give away all my worldly possessions via the blog.
Love,
Al
2008/11/23
2008/11/20
2008/11/19
2008/11/18
heroes and villains
The NBA is hard to come by in butt fuck Spain, so my thoughts are drifting ten years ago when a great hero came to the Meadowlands to spread joy and wealth:
Read about it here.
Read about it here.
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