2008/10/31

Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Halloween

Halloween was conceived in the womb of The Mexican Día de los muertes with the seed of American consumerism. As the zygote took shape in the latter part of the 20th century, it became imperative that all children, and their parent's money, created some type of costume for parades, and the much hallybalooed trick-or-treat.

The night before Halloween is often referred to in circles of 13 year old boys as "mischief night"; an opportunity to TP your least favorite Spanish teacher's house, or perhaps to smoke crack in the back alleway of the old bowling alley.

Gay people love Halloween. So do old people. Coincidence? I think not.

Twenty-Somethings and their elder/younger ilk often get intoxicated to the point of public costume removal at various parties with various themes by which costumes are composed.

Spain loves halloween for all the same reasons America does, except that instead of Candy, people hand out anti-communist pamphlets, since that's all the old folks got left in this place!

Someone chug a jaeger bomb for me and my brethren...