whoSE THE LAST GUY ON the End of Your Bench?: Toronto Raptors

The dragon swallowing its own tail is the story of our earth; the spheroid's ability to maintain its existence by sustaining on itself. Most human beings have a tough time seeing how their existence need be any different than that of the planet's; how can global warming be real if I can't afford groceries and health care in the same month?

Read about the ouroboros here.

So, what does any of this have to do with Canada? Well, dinosaurs might be a good place to start; we would like to believe that massive reptilian creatures roamed the earth for millions of years until a specific event brought about their extinction. The Raptors were the brain child of David Stern's then burgeoning expansion plan (monroe doctrine) for the National Basketball Association to do a better job than the MLB in Montreal. After the Vince Carter administration came to a close, things were looking rough, rough, rough for the fellows in purple and white up there in the concavity. Bring in a Colangelo and all of the sudden it's 2009-2010 and their roster looks great on paper. I'm pretty sure their head coach used to be in porn (update: that would be TT Boy, not Jay Triano).

They got rid of Delfino (no discount at the argentine steakhouse), acquired Jarret Jack (who probably enjoys the Bukowski poem, "Dinosauria, We" as much as any other DOOM fan) and paid out the ass for Hedo Turkoglu.

Who's helping them break .500?



Alvin Williams! Great scott!

Most important fact: Trevor Ariza and Amir Johnson went to HS together!