Something

Now that I've gotten the first guest post out of my system, I'm starting to wonder if I have anything left to write about. Fortunately, I just picked up a copy of Lewis Hyde's capitvating, Trickster Makes This World, an analysis of the role of the trickster; Hermes in Greek mythology, Coyote/Raven/Black Feet (the spirits have got me!) in Native American Lore, Loki in Norse Mythology and more contemporary artistic gadflies such as John Cage, Marcel Duchamp and Ron Artest, ok no Artest, but you get the point.



I'm only about a quarter way in, but I can already say that it is must read material for 2009; no, I don't use the online social network of goodreads.com, but I did just give them a free plug, so you'll just have to keep sifting through my junkpile style of prose to encounter other suggestions, some inferred, some explicit.

Racing Thoughts:
-Three weeks in to the no-shave game and I discovered I have a single red hair that grows on my chin; explain that to me Steven Pinker!
-Regina Spektor could never have come to be without Fiona Apple's crying coked out blackout blessing.
-Eric Mangini was once a ball boy for the Browns, now he's head honcho; I once met Romeo Crennel in a Phoenix, AZ airport, he had the softest hands...
-I was once disgusted by Drew Magary's utilization of the Nazi Shark on his deadspin.com column, but I've grown a lot since that moment. Props to a guy who can openly talk about his issues with parenting, berating pitchfork media (a la cult hero Samuel Crane Newhouse) and coming up with enough Darren Sproles nicknames to fill a 10cc vial (throwgasm is a brilliant witticism that has somewhat restored my faith in nfl faithfuls, somewhat).
-If I write a poem about Michael Douglas sucking my dick, I did, does it mean I have a problem or is it funny?
-Does an 8 am coffee always lead in to a 10 am coffee?
-Al loves the kids; insert humbert humbert reference here.
-The kids love Al; insert alchemist youtube clip here.

-The 2 euro Chicken Sausage contains trace elements of pork at the supermarket by my crib.
-That Jadakiss verse is on point in that Alchemist track.
-Brad Lidge owns a world series ring.
-Albert Pujols' last name is still hilarious
-Pusha T's verse is pretty fucking good too.
-Could Snoop make a later career push to become the next Nate Dogg? That is an inane and irrelevant thought I'm sorry.
-If there's one vagina that I'd crawl inside and die, if I could do such a thing, it would be yours mother earth; oops, that's actually what's gonna happen to me eventually.
-Favorite Big L line that I thought of in the last 30 seconds: Is Big L slow? Hell no! Bitches get fucked on the roof, if I ain't got no hotel though.

(Quick Note: I'm more partial to this than 2Pac's "I Ain't Mad Atcha", but that's some East Coast Bias if there ever was one.)
-Officially putting an APB out for Mcgruff...
-Flee the country to Argentina; leave it to Mason Betha to reference the Third Reich's diaspora circa 1946...
-Lowell George, lead singer of groove-heavy southern rockers Little Feat, is kind of like if Jack Black quit blowing so much coke, smoked opium all day while watching Gone With the Wind and replaced Kyle with some dope female backing vocals (huge mistake).

I just shit my pants, a masterworks 2? Cancel that, fuck these guys; masterworks 1 is the only one that matters; you can't usurp butt baby with live renditions of Pick of Destiny songs, not now, not ever.